To Love, To Be in Love
by Spongewolf
Summary: The musings of a pokemon trainer who longs to fill a void in her friend's heart. Voidcubeshipping drabble with some monochromeshipping greatly hinted.


To love. To be in love.

Rosa mused about which emotion could best describe the feeling she got whenever she was near N. She didn't seem to have the typical "schoolgirl in love" symptoms such as a red face or sweaty palms, though she always noted her heartbeat rapidly increasing near him.

It was another night, not too different from any other. N and Rosa sat on the ground, not far from Victory Road, a place where they had one of their earliest encounters. There was a reasonable distance between the two, and as Rosa wondered what was on her friend's mind, she had nonchalantly rested her hand on the ground, slightly filling the space in between them.

The placid silence continued for a few moments. Rosa eventually drew her hand back, as her little plan to have N hold her hand had backfired. The lack of words could have gone on for hours, but Rosa couldn't help but to get some questions off her chest.

"Those..." she said aloud, trying to figure out how to word her question. Not a second later, she continued. "Those two trainers you met years ago," Rosa began, noticing how quickly she had piqued N's interest. "Have you managed to see them? To hear about them?"

N faced his friend. "Not recently. It's been a while." His hooded eyes soon faced his feet. "I wish with all my heart that I could just see them again."

Rosa smiled. She knew all about how important the Pokemon trainers he met all those years ago were to him, but she always wanted to ask anyway. Whenever the conversation turned to the trainers, she would notice a side of N that one normally never got to see. His voice would be different and he would stumble over his words so as to not break down and cry. After this, he would always seem happy after remembering their last battle.

Rosa knew that he loved those trainers dearly.

N's eyes did not leave his feet, but they softened, as if he were recalling a happy memory. Rosa knew how he felt, but she just had to ask anyway.

"Do you love those trainers?"

N did not falter. "Yes." He faced Rosa, answering her question as clear as rain. "Yes, I do. They're very important to me, they... they taught me so much, I owe a lot to them."

Rosa listened to her friend chatter on about his favorite people. She always felt a warmness when hearing N talking about them, even though he was normally so distant. She soon caught herself tuning out some of what N was saying. This had been happening for some time, and even though Rosa wanted to hear him, she couldn't help but feel a little... _jealous_. The trainers held a special place in N's heart, and sometimes it just felt like Rosa was trying to fill a void that wasn't there.

Rosa had been thinking again about her feelings yet again. She nearly jeopardized N's happy mood when she interrupted. "Like, would you kiss them?"

N paused. "Uh..." Rosa did not get a clear answer for a few seconds. "If the situation called for it, then I suppose...?"

"So, not on your own free will?"

"I don't think so," N responded. "I wouldn't say that I feel for them romantically. But that doesn't mean they're not important."

It was Rosa's turn to look at her feet as she mulled over what she was just told. She knew now that even though she was outweighed in importance to N, it wasn't necessarily in a romantic sense. Somehow, this information confused her even more about how she felt about him.

"Have I made you upset?" N asked. "Were you expecting a different answer?"

"Kind of," Rosa responded. N extended an arm as an invitation for her to rest her head upon his shoulder. She accepted the gesture as he placed his hand on her shoulder. It was silent once again, but this time, it was unsettling. Neither expected the conversation to get anywhere after that.

Rosa didn't realize she was talking until it was too late. "Then, would you kiss me?"

The hand on Rosa's shoulder suddenly grew clammy after she uttered her question. Realized what she had said, she shot up with a wide-eyed expression. She nervously looked at N. He made direct eye contact with her, but had an uncomfortable look on his face that mirrored hers.

Rosa attempted an apology for her sudden inquiry, but soon stopped when she felt N's breath drawing closer. Their eyes shut, and their quivering lips made a sudden, warm encounter. No matter how coolly the wind blew, a heat radiated in them. It felt like an eternity, but just a second later, the contact was broken. The rush was still there as they looked at each other, without a sound.

N didn't blink once, but kept a dumbfounded look on his face. "Where did that come from...?" he asked Rosa, trying to grasp what he had just happened. He brushed his fingers on his lips as an attempt to process the kiss as his face gradually grew redder.

Rosa wasn't sure what she expected N to have done, but at least she had some answers to her questions. She knew that her friend loved those trainers dearly, and had known for a long time. While she still wasn't sure of what he felt about her, she knew one thing.

She was in love.


End file.
